Start your day right

How do you start your days? Most of us have a usual morning pattern.

Some hop out of bed, wash and dress, turn on the news, grab coffee with breakfast, and rush into the day.

Others hit the snooze button first. Some sit down for a leisurely breakfast.

What most people skip — that I skipped for decades — is a morning practice that sets you up for your best day.

Try a new way to start the day

When I worked with my first coach, I was urged to meditate every day. I resisted. I dabbled at it. It was a struggle for quite a while!

I would randomly take a break at my desk, put a timer on for 5 minutes, and try to quiet my mind until the chime sounded.

In time it got easier. I sat for longer times. I started to like it, but I did not love the part about pausing in the midst of my workday to do it.

I skipped it on many days, and sometimes did not return to meditating for weeks or months.

Over time I realized that timing was part of the problem. I changed to meditating first thing in the morning. That worked better for me.

And, in time, I added some new elements to the meditation.

I created a morning practice — and it’s had a significant impact on my life. 

As I’ve experimented, I have found a mix that I love.

You may want to try it, too.

A menu to pick from to create your best day 

My current practice starts with 5 to 10 minutes doing each of these 4 things:

• free writing

• meditating

• visualizing how I will show up for the things I will do in the day

• moving my body

And there’s more.

Rather than listen to or watch news, which used to add stress to my mornings, I select music I’m in the mood for each morning.

The music also helps me start to move. I often dance in my bedroom, or do some yoga poses. I usually add in a bit of free-weight action to build strength.

When I do sit down at my desk, I add one more important component.

I pull a card from one or two oracle decks that I love. I keep a journal and do some writing about the message(s) they bring me. This part of my practice helps me focus in how I will show up for everything in my day.

Your elements might be different!

You might include prayer, reading, saying affirmations, singing, getting outdoors, playing an instrument, or drawing.

The order you choose for your elements is up to you.

And you might choose to practice at a another time of day.

The key is to make a practice of the routine that most appeals to you and most supports you.

How having a daily practice works

Having a regular practice with elements like those described above helps you to connect to your heart.

A morning practice orients you to your day in a positive way.

It activates your body, your mind and your spirit.

Your practice will become a ritual.

And rituals are powerful.

Rituals can help you move through challenges, create new habits, create deeper self-awareness, feel more grounded, and feel more motivated.

And a daily ritual like this is a wonderful way to practice self-love. The more you love and believe in yourself, the more easily you can create what you truly want in your life.

I would love for you to share a daily practice if you have one you love — or feel free to ask me any questions you may have.

Email me to get in touch.

Shifting perspective shifts energy

For most of us, each day is full — there’s work to do, family and friends to interact with, there are time-sensitive matters that arise, and external events compete for our attention.

It is easy to feel scattered, easy to focus on others and local and world events, easy to feel pulled into drama that is not ours.

When this happens to me, as has often been the case lately, I remind myself of a few things. They may be helpful for you.

We each have limited control

While it is tempting to try and control, or fix, or change things that concern us, we can only control ourselves.

We can make suggestions, offer to help, look into resources, and listen with an open heart.

But we cannot control the actions another person or group will take. Nor can we control their emotions.

The key is to stay focused on the control we have:

• for the lens through which we choose to see things

• for the responses we choose to bring to a given situation

• to consider what lesson we can learn

• to consider how a situation is here for us

• to send loving energy to others

• to hold love for ourselves. 

We always have the opportunity to create

Even when tension runs high, it is possible to create a response rather than default to anger, fear, disappointment, anxiety or bitterness.

How?

• Create a few quiet moments to breathe, connect to your heart, and get grounded.

• Create some questions about what other ways you can consider to see the situation.

• Create new thoughts to anchor to, that are supportive and calm.

• Create a new next action to take that serves you and helps, if there is help to offer. 

• Create peace in yourself when you have done the best you can, or at times where you have no opportunity to effect change.

The bottom line

We can each only live our own life. And that is powerful!

There is unlimited potential to harness that power and and there are unlimited ways to use it.

When you take ownership of your thoughts, your responses, and the actions you take, you build strength.

You are a powerful creator of a life that is focused, resilient, and self-loving.

Your strength, in turn, allows you to do the most good, no matter what is happening around you.

And, to reach a state where you can stand in your power in the midst of whatever daily events show up, takes time, practice and patience.

It happens one small step at a time. 

Are you ready for something new?

This weekend I was immersed in the past. I lost my father in November, and the house he and my mother lived in has just been sold.

My sisters and I are in the process of emptying the house, and my job the last few days has been going through mountains of family photos — many from boxes of my grandparents that have been sitting in the basement of my parents’ house for decades.

Treasures have been found, emotions have been sparked, and I am gaining insights about how lives have been lived over long spans of time.

Seeing my parents, and their parents, in the bloom of youth and as they aged, is very sweet.

Seeing myself as an infant, during my childhood, as a gawky teenager, a young adult, a bride, and a mother, I am reflecting on the life I have lived, and the life I am living now.

How are you living your life?

Looking back at my professional life, it’s clear that I started in a career I enjoyed, and that I continued for several decades without considering if it was really fulfilling. 

What I became aware of, when in 2009 I hired my first coach to help me with my business, was that I had been drifting through my life without looking at or thinking deeply about the big picture.

I, like most busy professionals, was focused primarily on what was right in front of me. Added to work, raising children, serving on boards, making time to be with my husband, and managing a household, and my attention and focus were fully occupied.

Things seemed to be fine.

What was pivotal for me was working with a coach who asked me to took clearly at my life, and how I was showing up in it. 

When I did that, I saw a lot I had not noticed before. Slow steps followed by more small steps, I started to see many ways I was not showing up fully in my life. I also realized I no longer loved the work I had been doing for nearly 3 decades.

Most significantly, I realized I was ready to make changes.

What does it mean to be ready?

There are times when you know you are ready — for something new, something different, something more exciting. You feel it, and you take a step to bring that change into your life.

More frequently, the question of “being ready” — to look for or accept that new job, to make that big decision, to step into something different even if it is not fully defined in your mind — is one that feels unsettling, or even frightening.

I believe that when you start to get curious and feel a stirring, it is a significant signal from your heart.

Your heart may be “ready” before your head catches up!

That was my experience, and I see it all the time when I speak to women who have hesitated to look deeply, or take action, to explore a stirring they feel.

Fear and doubt show up. Many women are willing to settle for what is now, rather than take a new step.

I get it. 

These 3 steps may help

If you are pondering something new or different and not moving forward, see what happens when you proceed like this:

1. Get clear

First get curious. Ask yourself questions like these, and answer them honestly.

• What is working optimally in your life?

• What feels like a struggle, or feels simply “ok”? 

• What lights you up?

• What do you want more of?

• What do you want less of?

Add more questions that come to mind, and look clearly at what you discover.

2. Set an intention

Your intention can be to research and learn more about a new possibility that you want to consider.

It can be to reach out to people who can advise and/or support you.

It can be to initiate a change — with a very small step, or a larger one.

3. Take action

This step is key.

Until you take some action (remember that small actions count!), and commit to staying in action, one of two things will happen.

Changes that you have declared you want will not happen.

Or you will be at the mercy of inevitable changes that happen around you. Rarely will changes like that match up to what you had envisioned for yourself.

Is it time to say “Yes” to your biggest, best life?

My life was pretty great before I looked closely and decided that I wanted less stress and to be more lit up every day.

I decided to create a more fulfilling future, and I have not stopped creating my life.

I have had great coaches, mentors and teachers who have supported me, inspired me, and believed in me. I am forever grateful to them, and grateful to myself.

I am aware that when I said, “Yes” to myself, I gave myself a gift far greater than I could have imagined on the day I started this journey.

I deeply appreciate all that my grandparents and parents did to set me on my path. And I am proud that I used that foundation as a springboard to a bigger, happier life — where I can help other great women to become the creators of the lives they yearn for.

I invite you to experience yourself living a life that delights you! 

And I’d be happy to explore the possibility of working with you to make that dream your reality.

My father, my grandfather and my mother holding me at the start of my life’s journey.

Finding strength in the why

What matters enough to stretch and extend yourself, to do something that’s important to you, even when you are really tired?

Maybe there is a family matter, or something related to your work, or a passion you feel for a cause, that is so pressing or important that you dig deep to focus time and energy for it.

I have been stretching myself to attend to pressing family matters for many months. I have been flying to Philadelphia from Boston so often that the people at the Admiral’s Club desk recognize and greet me each time I arrive. One time recently, when I fumbled to find the card that is required for entry, they told me, “Oh, we know you, just go in!” That’s when you know you have been traveling a lot!

These trips have been important. And they have been taxing. 

I have needed to make adjustments in a number of ways to do all of the travel, as well as making calls, doing research, sending and replying to emails, and other tasks related to the my father’s failing health, my sister’s health crisis, and more recently, matters related to my father’s estate.

Finding strength when you need it

I am amazed at the way adrenaline has kicked in when I have need it. This hormone is produced in the adrenal gland to help you deal with stressful or dangerous situations.

And while a rush of adrenaline can be literally life-saving in some circumstances, and has carried me at notable moments, there are other ways we can find strength.

• Focus on the why

When you feel called to take action and can keep the WHY clear in your thoughts, you may be surprised by the amount of strength you will feel. This fundamental approach to how you focus your thoughts can support you in countless situations.

• Envision the outcomes

Knowing that my efforts were making a meaningful difference in the life of a loved one — envisioning my father’s contentment at knowing he was loved and cared for, and “seeing” what restored health would be like in the case of my sister — has frequently given me strength.

Similarly, knowing my efforts were smoothing the way to a positive conclusion for myself and my family in the aftermath of my father’s death, and imagining what that would look and feel like, has given me tremendous strength, even when I was not sure I had any left. 

The same can be true when you are dedicated to a cause about which you are passionate, or launching a new endeavor that is deeply meaningful to you. Envision what it will it look like thanks to your efforts.

• Get help

Rather than figuring everything out on your own, or doing it all yourself, when you seek out help (by asking for it from people you know, or hiring experts, or availing yourself of services that are around you) you will not be expending as much effort on your own and will have more strength for the efforts you undertake.

Remember the importance of self-care

How you take care of yourself during demanding times, and afterwards, is crucially important.

Pay attention to how you feed yourself and stay hydrated. Make sleep a priority. See where you can open space in your schedule, so you can move at a slower pace when possible. Aim to connect to people you enjoy, and do things you love (like getting out in nature, visiting a museum, having a favorite food delivered).

Get the support you need

I have been fortunate to have remarkable, loving support in my life, and that has made a huge difference during this taxing time.

My coaches have been a most valued resource. My husband has been my rock. My children have chipped in. Friends have lent a loving ear.

This has enabled me to look ahead to all I intend for myself and my work in the year that lies ahead.

If you are thinking about what really matters to you now — whether you want to get clear or you know what that looks like — and you think that getting support could be the way to move ahead with more ease, my upcoming Live Big Live retreat might be right for you.

Email me and we can make a date for you to learn about this program, and we’ll see if it’s a fit.

Take time to just be

Winter has finally arrived in New England, after mild and rainy months in November and December.

Enjoying the visual delight of a shimmering white coating on snow-covered trees, I am treating myself to a snow day.

Snuggling in with a cozy blanket, sipping hot tea, Edith Piaf serenading me, this is a treat I am delighted to give myself.

What about you? 

You do not need actual snow to have a snow-day

Few of us take the time to be quiet, to rest, to simply let ourselves BE.

If you tend to live the way I lived much of my life, you are likely so caught up in doing, that you rush through your days and miss the opportunity to get quiet, rest, and connect to your heart. 

You may wait for a vacation to take a break, and even then, you may have a full schedule and be in constant motion.

Making time to slow down and indulge your body and your spirit is a gift you can choose to give yourself — no matter the calendar or weather.

And you need not make it a full day of down time, if that’s not practical.

If there is a lot going on, look for ways to bring a short respite into your day.

And take a look at you schedule. Block off space for being at regular intervals — whether you want that time for reading, journaling, assembling a puzzle, drawing, day-dreaming, cooking something fun, walking in a special place, or connecting for a longed-for conversation with someone you miss.

The gift of stillness and quiet

When you make small, or more extended, periods of quiet time a regular part of your life, remarkable things can happen.

For me, it works in a similar way that savasana does at the end of a yoga class — the period of stillness at the conclusion of a physical practice. In the stillness, my nervous system is remarkably quiet. I feel a distinctive sense of relaxation and feel refreshed.

I also make a deep connection to my heart — what it wants and what it needs. 

And in that “emptiness” I often find insights and ideas show up that are fresh and surprising.

Many times I find myself feeling more alive and inspired to move into the next part of the day.

At the start of this fresh new year, why not see how making a “snow-day” practice of your own will work for you?  Email me and let me know how it goes. I'll be delighted to hear.

A journey to abundance

If you saw my blog post last week, you know I was away. I hope you enjoyed the photo of the gorgeous landscape I shared, that I got to savor every day that I was in Texas.

For four big days there I was on a “mini-sabbatical” with my coach and a fantastic group of people in my mastermind group. The theme we dove deep to explore was “abundance as a way of being.” 

We started by digging into how our beliefs have been shaped about three big aspects of abundance — time, money and love — seeing many ways that we have each lived with scarcity and how limiting that has been. 

We defined abundance for ourselves, and had deep somatic and energetic experiences to anchor to the embodiment of abundance. We played, too, and did wonderful creative work to express and bring home visual reminders for ourselves. (As you can imagine, I loved this!)

And on the final afternoon, we went into the nearest town, in groups of 4, to share love and bring generosity into the world. This was a highlight of my experience — helping people load groceries in the Walmart parking lot; buying large bouquets and giving people roses to brighten their day; choosing socks, bibs, teething rings and other baby gear to donate at the Good Will store; stopping at a cemetery to leave flowers on graves.

The outcome of this time away and all I soaked in is a far deeper level of inspiration, insight and self-trust, knowing that abundance is a mindset that informs the way I live each day.

My daily morning practice of gratitude, meditation, reflection and writing is now infused with a focus on serving, and building more ease receiving. I am also clear about the people I want to be with, whose energy and spirit lift and inspire me.

How can you live abundantly today?

Perhaps you will step into your garden and marvel at the beauty of nature.

Maybe you will surprise someone with a call or note to tell them you appreciate them.

If you notice thoughts rooted in doubt or scarcity, intentionally reframe those thoughts.

Can you think of something simple to do for yourself? It could be to pause and make a cup of tea, to savor a flavor you love. You might get to bed earlier, or listen to great music while you attend to a task.

If you notice negativity in someone near you, can you make a choice to limit that contact, or process what they are saying and doing differently?

Doing small things like these can shift your energy and your thoughts in meaningful ways.

And the more you bring this kind of awareness into your life the bigger the shifts will be.

I welcome you to share your thoughts, challenges, questions and desires about living your most abundant life on a call with me.

Email me, or find a date on my calendar and we can chat (there’s no cost or obligation!).

Savoring time off the grid

Writing my weekly blog is something I love to do and feel deeply committed to.

This week, I am away at a retreat with my coach and a wonderful group of people doing deep personal work alongside me.

I am honoring myself by being fully present in this experience.

Enjoy this photo of the magnificent landscape I am inspired by while in Texas.

Slow down to find clarity

Perhaps the weather is finally getting more seasonally cool where you are, as it is here in Boston. The fall season brings many things to mind.

Like many people, I am thinking about how I want to make the most of the final quarter of this year. 

And with lots of big ideas percolating, it would be easy for me to drive myself hard. After all, there are barely 12 weeks until 2024 gets underway.

For most of my life I was focused on pushing myself. It was such a “normal” way for me to live and work that I never considered the possibility of a different approach to my life.

What about you?

Is constant pushing your “normal”? 

If it is, does it make you happy?

Do you hold the belief that it’s the only way to get things done and achieve?

What if there is another way?

I have been learning to slow down for over a decade! 

I have become keenly aware that, for me, being thoughtful and taking intentional, clear action works much better than plowing frantically through my days.

Going more slowly to get more done, and to be more satisfied with my work and my life, was counterintuitive when my first coach introduced the concept to me.

Being willing to try it, finding ways to experience more satisfaction and accomplishment, and consistently practicing over time has made a huge difference in my life.

I am clear about the benefits of living and working without “push energy” — that I had thought was the only way to succeed. (I, like most of us, had internalized the way our culture glorifies and celebrates hard, hard work). 

My new approach has proven to be remarkably beneficial.

3 steps you can try for yourself

Rather than plowing through your days, living with stress, and collapsing in exhaustion, here is a way to start approaching your life differently that you can explore.

1. Make a small shift to create space for you to “be.”

When you start your day with space for thinking, feeling and intentional planning, many things will start to change.

Even if you have kids to get to school or other demands on your time, think about adjustments you can make to start your day in a new way.

You might realize that getting to bed a bit earlier will enable you to wake up sooner than you have been, so you can give yourself the gift of 10 to 20 minutes to yourself.

You might create a new morning pattern or routine with those in your household, that provides you with some precious quiet time for yourself.

You might decide that a current habit can be replaced, that will support a quiet, focused mind. (For me, switching away from listening to news first thing in the morning, and instead choosing music I was in the mood for, made a wonderful difference.)

If you want more ideas, I have a lovely guide, Creating Space for YOU, to help you do just that. Just email me and I will get it right off to you,

2. Choose how to center yourself.

You might write in a journal.

You can quietly list things for which you are grateful.

You might want to move your body in a particular way — doing yoga poses, moving through a quick workout, taking a walk outside.

With some focus established, you will be ready to think about your day with quiet energy and sharper perspective.

3. Set your intention.

Setting a clear intention for yourself makes great things possible.

Your intention could be to move thoughtfully through your day, rather than rushing and reacting.

You might intend to show up boldly in a conversation, or get something specific accomplished with focus and ease.

You might intend to sustain a positive frame of mind all day.

You might intend to ask for help for a matter that has challenged you, or to make something easier to accomplish.

Your intention may well include several components.

The key is to be loving to yourself as you set intentions that will support you to have the best day you can.

You are responsible for your experiences

When you set the stage for quiet, intentional thinking each morning, and do as much as you can to follow through on the intentions you set, you will see meaningful changes unfold in your life.

You have this opportunity.

You have the power to bring change into your life, to live in a sustainable way, that enables you to thrive.

You can make the most of 2023 and step into a new year with clear energy, sharp focus, greater clarity and deep enthusiasm.

That is what being a creator of your life, living big, is all about.

If you want to talk about how you can begin to make significant change in your life, I may be able to help.

The best way to start is to book a quick intro call with me.

You are under no pressure, no obligation. I promise only an honest conversation where you can talk about the deep desires you have for your life and what's in the way for you now. I can share fresh insight and perspective, and tell you about programs I offer that may be a fit for you.

Email me, or find a time on my calendar here. 

Unlock the power of daily reflection.

Most of us launch into our days, moving through a brisk morning routine and then attending meetings and handling tasks and projects that fill our packed calendars. We end the day only to start again the next morning.

In the midst of a busy life, it’s easy to loose sight of the opportunity we each have to pause, reflect and make simple choices that can have a big positive impact.

Three questions you can ask yourself today

If, instead of moving from one thing to the next as quickly as possible, you choose to briefly stop, breathe quietly for a minute ot two, and then ask yourself a good question, you can change the tone and intensity of any busy day.

Here are questions you may want to choose from:

1. What one thing really matters now?

When you choose this question and focus on the top thing that matters most right now, you are able to bring both awareness and clarity to your day. Your attention will no longer be splattered.

This pause enables you to consider how you might reshuffle other things on the calendar if that is needed, or who you can ask to help you, or what resources are available that you had not considered as you rushed though the day.

2. What will me happy now?

It’s easy to forget that you deserve to be happy, and that there is always an opportunity to have moments of pleasure in your life — even when things are busy!

This is not a frivolous or selfish thing to make a priority, It is self-loving. And when you honor yourself by choosing to inject happiness into your day, you put positive fuel in your engine.

• Maybe a quick text or call to someone special will lift your spirits. 

• Maybe a short walk in nature, or a stop at a lovely cafe will give you a boost. 

• Maybe planning something special you can look forward to doing at the end of your day will light up your heart.

3. What promise can I make to myself now?

This question offers you a terrific opportunity to reflect on something you want to commit to — for yourself, for your wellbeing.

Tap your heart and find something that you want.

Keep in mind that small desires are a great for two reasons — they matter, and they will not make you feel overwhelmed.

Here are some prompts that may get you started:

• You might promise yourself to get to bed a little earlier. 

• You might promise yourself to ask for something you have held back on requesting.

• You might promise yourself to be kinder — to yourself or someone else. 

• You might promise yourself to follow through on a task you have been avoiding.

• You might promise yourself to be a bit bolder today.

• You might promise yourself to start planning an adventure you have been longing to take.

This small daily practice can bring big shifts

We tend to underestimate the significant impact that small actions can have.

You may want to remind yourself to ask one of these questions each day (and you may have other questions you want to add).

Why not download this graphic, print it, and use it as a reminder?

I’d be happy to hear about how this practice works for you.

And I am always happy to talk about how you want to Live Big.

Email me today! 

How to savor every day

Most of us focus on destinations, goals, and achievements.

What if you savored the journey?

What if you held the vision of that desired state and lived in each present moment?

This is why it’s great to focus on now

When your attention is fixed on a destination, you miss what is happening now — including new opportunities and great sensations.

When you live in the present, you appreciate all of your experiences as you move in the direction of your desired outcome.

What’s more, you can tune in to new possibilities and can gain fresh awareness of ways to support your goals.

And maybe best of all, you will have more fun!

Ready to give this new way of approaching your days a try?

How to stay in the present

It’s tempting to focus on the future. However, doing that often leads to thinking of a million what-ifs — which is not only stressful, it hijacks your attention and fragments your focus.

It’s also easy to look back and repeatedly rehash old experiences. While there are lessons to be learned from looking at the past, the rehashing usually hurts as you tend to focus on shortcomings and feelings of regret.

If you find yourself stuck in either of those states, try these ways to return to the present:

1. Be alert to your thoughts.

It can be helpful to jot notes about the times you fast-forward or dive back into examining past events.

Can you notice types of triggers that pull your attention away from what is happening now? Are there times of day, or specific people, or patterns you can become aware of?

Awareness can help you to avoid those situations — or spot them start early on. That's a great way to consciously bring your attention back to the present.

2. Observe what is happening now and create your response.  

Consider where you are and what’s going on around you. Choose the present as your focus, at least for a little while.

Think about where you have opportunities right now — like the opportunity to have a meaningful conversation, or to shift to a more positive approach, or to come up with a new idea.

Ask yourself if there might be a challenge to address that you may have been avoiding when you turned your attention to the future or the past..

Be thoughtful as you contemplate your options and make your best choices.

3. Appreciate and honor your emotions.

When you are present and feel excited and eager about what is happening, and all that is possible for you now, make the most of the energy. Let yourself fully enjoy what you are doing. Let that positive energy carry you!

If you find yourself feeling discomfort, or fear, or sadness, or stress, it may be tempting to try and ignore it.

A better approach is to let yourself feel the feelings for a little while, and then use those feelings as fuel for some type of creative expressions.

For some that's writing. For some it helps to dig in the dirt, or go for a run. Some people move their bodies to music, or hammer away in a workshop, or sing loudly in their car. (This may be a quick effort, or may need repeating until you feel the emotion has been released.)

Having expressed yourself to use your emotions, you are likely to feel lighter, ready to refocus on all the opportunities and possibilities in the present moment.

And speaking of opportunities, when you live in the present you will have many opportunities to appreciate yourself. Acknowledge yourself for each step you take, for noticing new possibilities and testing them, and for all of your progress (the small steps as well as bigger leaps).

Living in the present is a great way to Live Big.

Setting healthy boundaries can be easier than you think

Last week I wrote about boundaries — what they are and why they matter so much. If you missed “Part 1” of this topic, you may want to click here and read about it.

As promised, today I’m sharing ways you can set boundaries without distress, to help you live your best life.

To begin, it can be helpful to check in and ask yourself how you relate to boundaries.

How do you feel about setting boundaries?

We all have the opportunity to draw the lines — create boundaries — that align with and protect our desires, values and preferences.

And, most people shy away from setting boundaries.

Many do not feel comfortable saying, “No.” They do not feel confident stating what is on their mind and setting standards that are aligned with what is right for them.

Here are a few reasons people shy away from setting boundaries:

Many people hate to say “No” because they want to be nice.

This fear of not being nice is people-pleasing — something remarkably common among both men and women.

People-pleasers are focused on making other people happy or trying to get others to like them. This focus typically starts when people are young, and can be deeply ingrained.

They aim to avoid conflict to such a degree that they are willing to put their own needs, values and preferences behind those of others.

Many people are afraid to lose love or approval.

We all long for love and approval. Many people are so afraid of rejection or disapproval that they do not ask for what they need, or ask for something different, or assert themselves.

When you compromise this way, you fail to make your own well-being your top priority. It is also typical to feel unworthy of love and approval. Thus you are willing to sacrifice your own contentment, satisfaction and happiness. This often results in resentment and unhappiness.

Many people simply do not know how to set boundaries — even when they yearn for them.

This is the easiest challenge to overcome.

When you know the boundary you want to establish — be it setting a firm limit about when you are available and when you are not; or stating that you will no longer take on every task someone asks you to help with; or establishing a clear policy about lending things to others; or setting an “energetic boundary” to keep painful actions and remarks from wounding your heart; or anything else — you can get crystal clear about why that boundary matters to you.

Why do you want to change the way things are now?

What will change for the better when the new boundary is in place?

Think about how you will feel, the time that will open up for you, the benefits to the relationship you have with another person, etc.

When you have the what and the why clearly in mind, implementing the boundary (the how) is going to be easier than you may think.

How to set any boundary, in 3 steps

When you are clear about a given boundary you want to set, and why it matters, follow these steps to set and hold that boundary.

1. Articulate the boundary clearly and specifically.

Start by getting crystal clear about the person or people you will set this boundary with. One person may be your focus now, but there may be others with whom that boundary also needs to be set.

Next, be very clear about what the boundary entails, and what it will look like when it is in place.

With this clarity you will be ready to communicate the specifics to the party or parties you have identified.

2. Understand that you can communicate boundaries with kindness.

Some boundaries are low-stakes, and may not feel intimidating to set. And, even the boundaries you feel most concerned about setting can be set with kindness.

Keep in mind that “kind” is different than “nice.” You do not need to fall into people-pleasing mode at all! You can kindly tell someone that you have commitments that preclude you from taking on new volunteer assignments, or that you are no longer able to answer calls on the weekend, or that you have established a new policy about loaning money.

Keep in mind, too, that your boundaries are kind to yourself, and that that is important!

3. Stay consistent.

Once you have communicated the new boundary, you may find that others do not fully respect that boundary. They may hope you will “relax the rule” or make exceptions for them. They may forget out of habit. They may try to persuade you to return to the pre-boundary way of interacting.

Keep the reason the boundary mattered to you to start with firmly in mind. Stay clear and determined about sustaining your new policy.

In time, people will either honor your boundary or not. If they choose not to honor your boundary you will have important information and can make a decision about making changes to that relationship.

Start small, but start!

Whether you are nervous about setting any new boundary, or you feel called to set a bold boundary, it will be best to start with setting a small, low-stakes boundary.

One that is likely to be easy for others to accept (and may be harder for you to stick to!), is to set limits on when you will respond to emails. You may want to add a signature to your emails stating when people will receive replies from you. (For example, you might say that you check emails twice each day, at 9:00am and 4:00pm, and that you respond to emails within 24 hours.)

After you have a couple of easy-to-communicate boundaries in place, you can aim for setting a boundary that is a bit more emotionally weighty. Being clear about the new boundary, and having a plan in place to communicate with kindness, you are likely to feel ready to declare your new boundary.

Big rewards await you

Be sure, after you have established each boundary, to take note of the impact it has for you, and celebrate yourself — you deserve to feel proud!

Each boundary you put in place creates clear space for you to bring more joy, more play, more creativity and more of what lights you up into your life.

That is what living big is all about!

Boundaries — what they are and why to love them

Many women I talk to fail to consider — or actively avoid — setting boundaries.

I know that I had not given boundaries much thought for most of my life. And when I began to think about setting boundaries, a lot of discomfort showed up.

The truth, that I have come to understand and experience, is that each boundary you set is a gift to yourself. And boundaries can always be set with kindness. 

This is a big topic — in fact, so big that I will address different types of boundaries now, as well as why they are important. Next week I will share ways to set boundaries that will help you live your best life.

Consider two types of boundaries

There are physical boundaries and abstract personal boundaries. Both of these categories are important.

Physical boundaries

Physical boundaries include things like walls and fences. We can all recall what moats with drawbridges look like, that were built in medieval times to protect castles from invaders.

When we set a physical boundary, we are making it explicit to people to respect our space and not intrude on our privacy. 

You may want to set physical boundaries related to the kinds of physical contact you welcome — and contact you do not want. Perhaps you hate being hugged. Perhaps you don’t like being in crowded places. 

You may want to create private physical spaces, indoors (such as a room of your own) or outdoors (think fences and walls), where you can have solitude or pursue personal projects or activities. You may want people to knock before entering a room you occupy.

You may want to create a private space where your personal belongings, such as journals or keepsakes, will not be seen by others.

You may set boundaries related to material things you are willing/not willing to share, such as objects or money.

Some people need to set boundaries to have private spaces that will protect their safety.

Emotional boundaries

An emotional personal boundary is a limit, or rule, that you set with others (and sometimes with yourself) to delineate things that are important to you and your wellbeing.

In short, by setting these boundaries you make clear what is acceptable to you.

Emotional boundaries can relate to your time in a variety of ways.

When are you available? This can be to take phone calls or answer emails, or available to help with doing tasks for others. 

What tasks are you willing to take on, such as saying yes to doing “favors” for people, or doing more than your “fair share” (at home and at work)?

Emotional boundaries relate to your spirit, too. In these cases, you are setting limits to protect your emotional wellbeing.

For instance, you may choose which information to share and things to keep to yourself.

Or, if you have compromised your wellbeing by tolerating a relationship that is not healthy for you, you may know that a change is needed.

Here is another example. Maybe you allow others’ behavior to distress you, rather than creating a virtual, energetic boundary to protect your wellbeing — even in the face of their insensitivity or deliberately hurtful actions.

Why not bring awareness to places and situations where new or better boundaries will be helpful, in order to bring you more happiness and/or reduce stress in your life?

The gifts that boundaries deliver

While it may feel uncomfortable to think about setting boundaries — with people you are close to, with colleagues and clients, with strangers — you will reap many benefits. 

You will feel increased self-confidence and happiness.

Your relationships will be stronger and better when you clearly communicate what you want and do not want, as well as what you need and what are unwilling to tolerate.

You will feel great when you hold your standards, without guilt or apologies.

You will protect your spirit and feel grounded and clear.

Doesn’t all of that sound great?

Next week I will share ways to set new boundaries. It is often less “hard” to do than you may think!

Ready to live bigger? Start with these 5 steps!

Most accomplished women I talk with express a desire to live a truly balanced and fulfilling life. While they yearn to show up fully every day, have an impact, and thrive, many confide that they feel limited and frustrated in their efforts to make that vision their reality.

Most take on too much.

Some don’t advocate for what they want — in their professional lives and in personal relationships.

They put their needs (for self-care, pursuit of personal interests, quiet time and more) behind those of others.

They compromise.

While they love the idea of living their biggest life, it does not feel natural for many of them to think of changing the ways they currently operate. Or they simply do not know where to begin to make changes.

Some even feel that the idea of living big may be too much — too much to expect for themselves, and/or too hard to achieve.

You cannot think too big, or live too big

One thing I know to be true is that all of us can learn, small step followed by small step, to show up fully in the world.

We can create the lives we yearn for!

We can overcome our doubts and limitations to pursue all that we desire and to have our biggest impact.

Can you embrace this truth? 

When you choose to pursue your biggest life, I urge you to be mindful that making significant changes is a process that unfolds over time.

These 5 steps will get the ball rolling.

1. Start with one small shift

When you start with new awareness, add commitment, and are willing to be patient as you make small shifts, you will begin to experience meaningful change.

And you can build on that change over time.

Here is a great place to start:

Ask yourself what small change will have the biggest impact for you now?

Maybe it’s getting more sleep.

Maybe it’s speaking up more clearly and boldly for something important.

Maybe it’s saying “No” without feeling guilty.

Maybe you will choose something else.

Make a choice!

2. Focus on that change

To help you stay focused, make reminders for yourself.

Use your phone, or put colored post-it notes on your desk, your bathroom mirror, your coffee-maker, and your laptop.  

You can ask for help from a trusted friend. They can be a sounding board, and might text you every day at a particular time to see how it’s going. 

Be creative and have fun with ways to keep yourself focused on this meaningful change.

3. Make a plan

For instance, if more rest is key for you now, will you get to bed earlier? Might you take a power nap at a time when your energy drops?

If you want to feel less discomfort saying “No,” you might journal in the morning and write about why it is important for you to stop crowding your days with obligations to others, rather than yourself.

Then, if you know a request is pending, or someone is waiting for an answer, or you simply want to be forearmed, take some time to practice kind ways to decline the request. 

4. Track your progress

Subtle changes can be hard to notice. Keep a small journal, or a running record on a device, to record the daily efforts you make and the outcomes you experience.

Take note of what works and what does not meet your expectations so you build on positive approaches. And note specific outcomes as they occur. 

If you have an accountability buddy or a coach, ask for feedback as you share your progress and your outcomes.

And acknowledge your progress — even small shifts are worthy of celebrating! It is the small shifts that become new habits, and your new normal. 

5. Keep going!

As you bring small changes into your life, and experience the way they enhance your wellbeing, momentum will build.

You will be ready to identify and embrace new changes you want to make, and you will likely feel increased confidence and enthusiasm about pursuing them.

This is how living big works.

As we each expand and live the satisfying life we desire today, we see more and more opportunity ahead.

We can all continue to step up and live with even more passion and authenticity and joy. And our impact is amplified as we continue to shine more and more brightly.

I invite you to join me on this path of expansion. My dream is for all of us to live all of our greatness. Let’s Live Big together!

(And if you’d like to share your vision of your biggest life, I’d be delighted to hear about it. Email me and we’ll make a date to talk.)

What does “commitment” mean to you?

Maybe you are a bit of a word nerd like I am.

The word “commitment” comes up in my life and my work with clients remarkably often, so I decided to took a look at the definition.

Here’s how the Cambridge Dictionary defines “commitment”:

• a promise or firm decision to do something

• willingness to give your time and energy to a job, activity, or something that you believe in

• something that you must do or deal with that takes your time

This is a powerful word, and one I do not take lightly.

A promise is something serious and sacred. 

A firm decision is not always easy to make, but when you do make one it’s a big deal.

Willingness entails embracing the unknown and engaging in the work to make your decision become a reality.

And the process nearly always takes time.

We juggle lots of commitments

The accomplished women I work with are typically loaded with commitments.

They do work that is important and often demanding.

Most have families that entail commitments.

Many volunteer in a range of ways. 

And many want to make (or try and keep) commitments to themselves. They aim to focus on self-care, or passion projects, or more space for joy, and many find those commitments at the bottom of the list.

What true commitment looks like.

Every commitment is a promise, and there are only so many promises we can make and keep.

The key is to choose your commitments based on what is really important to you, and what is realistic for you now — so you can keep the promises. 

Choosing your commitments with care is the key to seeing them through.

The commitments you make will vary in size. The mix has to add up to what you can not only do, but do with joy.

Here are some examples of commitments I have witnessed that may inspire you.

1. Finding a new direction

More than one client I’ve worked with realized that burnout was taking a toll that was intolerable. The first commitment each made was to find a new path that would be fulfilling and sustainable — both personally and financially. Next came a willingness to embark on creating something new. Learning curves were daunting at times. Determination, patience and support were needed to launch new consulting practices. The outcomes have been tremendous for all of them.

2. Creating what their hearts desire

Two clients are leaders with demanding roles, in positions they care about and are great at. And, both have a deep passion (and talent!) for work that is quite different from their “day jobs”. Both are committed to nurturing and building the businesses they are truly passionate about. It entails careful decision-making and focus, as they honor what they truly love and plan to transition to consulting for their organizations. They will then make the work they are deeply passionate about their primary professional focus.

3. Reshaping work and life

Several entrepreneurs have realized they want to reshape their businesses to be more fulfilling, sustainable and lucrative. They have committed to getting clear about what they truly want and exploring avenues for change. The decisions are big and the executions need to be carefully and courageously carried out. It is exciting to see them commit to the process and reap the rewards.

Choose your commitments

Consider commitments in many sizes and flavors.

Maybe you want to commit to something small and meaningful, such as getting outdoors to walk every day, rain or shine.

Maybe you want to commit to withdrawing (with kindness) from things you said “Yes” to but realize they are not aligned for you, or you said yes to please someone, or you know it is not realistic for you to follow though with.

Maybe your new commitment will be to gracefully say “No” to anything that will overload you.

After you choose a small new commitment to bring into your life, consider the bigger commitments you long to make.

Don’t be shy.

You, too, can make meaningful new commitments and live your biggest life!

What if it was easy?

We often start a tightly-scheduled day, or have a new project to tackle, and feel that it will be hard. It does not seem possible to squeeze everything on the list into the hours of the day ahead. The new project is complex and feels daunting.

I was accustomed to thinking things would be hard for most of my life.

I looked at my schedule and felt heavy thinking about how hard it was going to be to get so many things done on time.

I thought about a new project with worry about how I would get all the facts, create a plan, recruit the right people and resources, and execute on the plan by the deadline.

That mental starting point, that heaviness and concern, set me up for struggle — until I learned that there was another way to consider “challenges” like these.

A great question changed everything

In a conversation with my coach a few years back, I was sharing how burdened I felt by many things on my to-do list, about looming deadlines, about how to figure out some things that were stumping me.

She paused and asked me a great question:

“What if it was easy?”

I was taken aback! I had never considered that any of those things might be easy, or could be easy.

I was in the habit of thinking about things as being hard to do, and hard to get done in the midst of a busy day (and my busy life).

It can be easier than you think

When I shifted to considering “What if it was easy?” and telling myself, “This can be easy,” my world changed!

I began approaching my to-do list with a lightness I’d rarely felt on hectic days. I now look at my calendar and my to-do lists and think to myself that I can certainly move through the events and tasks with ease.

I also begin with positive, optimistic and excited energy as I embark on big new projects. 

And by making those shifts I have been rewarded in wonderful ways.

Most tasks feel manageable and get completed with ease. For those that require more time and effort, for whatever reason, I stay relaxed and they go much more smoothly than in the past.

At the end of the day I am less depleted and I have enjoyed my work!

And when I begin new projects that are complex and important (as I will do later today), my frame of mind is more playful, open and excited. I begin with the expectation that it can, indeed, be easy to approach and complete. I enjoy the process of jumping in to new projects.

Add another positive thought to the equation

There is another new way of thinking that combines brilliantly with, “What if it was easy?”

I suggest you start each day with the thought:

“I have an abundance of time!”

Embracing this belief makes an enormous difference for me, enabling me to move through my days with so much more ease. 

Combining the two statements removes stress and increases both productivity and satisfaction in remarkable ways. 

My clients swear by the power of embracing these two statements, too.

Test it for yourself

I invite you to try making these two ideas — separately and in combination — a regular part of your approach to your day.

You can download the graphic below. Why not print it and post where you can see it every day so that it serves as a welcome reminder?

I predict that it will not be long until these new thoughts become familiar and will have a positive impact for you. 

I would be delighted to hear from you when you bring these ideas into daily practice. Email me to let me know if they boost your day-to-day wellbeing.

Give yourself the gift of going deep

Most accomplished women are lucky to carve out bits of time for quiet reflection, much less deep thinking.

Endless to-do lists run their lives. And when time does open up, many don’t think to reflect, or know how to approach quiet inquiry. They usually find themselves returning to being busy, or they get distracted in all sorts of ways that quickly fill time. 

What going deep can look like

I first ventured into deep personal exploration over a decade ago and it changed my life. Working with a coach, I was prompted and guided to explore questions I never had before.

And a notable part of my journey was when I dared to start painting in 2015. It has enabled me to know myself and express myself in truly remarkable ways.

Having just returned from attending a fabulous week at a writing retreat, I am so glad I took a big new step on my path of meaningful expansion.

I was guided to bravely begin writing and to trust myself in a new medium. I was with a small group of inspiring women, also bravely writing stories that were powerful, funny, moving, raw, and provocative. We all explored and made discoveries found in deep places inside of us. 

We each dared to take this time for ourselves, motivated by a desire to grow in new ways as we shaped our ideas, committed them to paper, and received loving feedback from our teacher and each other.

We showed up for ourselves. We connected to parts of ourselves we do not usually approach. We excavated courageously and found gems.

I see great similarities between what happened for me last week and what I witness each time I lead my Live Big Live! program.

I feel a thrill when I see my clients discover exciting and gratifying work — or reignite their passion for what they do each day.

It is wonderful to observe the ways they are now forging, or repairing, or finding relationships from a grounded, clear, centered place.

They are each moving into exciting futures, with space to honor their well-being, with clarity, confidence and joy.

Are you ready to meet yourself in a new way?

The experience of connecting to yourself and igniting a huge spark in your life is possible for you, too.

If you are intrigued by the idea of making time for your own journey to your heart, so that you connect to your deep desires, clarify a vision for your most fulfilling future, and express yourself with joy, the spring Live Big Live! program may be right for you. 

You can be part of an intimate group of wonderful women who are bravely honoring themselves as they embark on rewarding journeys of self-discovery.

If you hear a small voice (or maybe a loud, “Yes!”) saying this is the time to connect to all of who you are, and be guided to living your most fulfilling life (whether you have an image of what that looks like or are trying to figure it out), let’s get on a call.

There are still a few spots available for the upcoming Live Big Live! retreat, but the deadline for enrollment is coming fast.

Let’s connect and see if this is a fit for you.

Schedule a call today

Let’s figure out what you really want

Here’s a question that may sound simple: Do you know what you want?

It’s an important question, but many women consider it in a superficial way.

Knowing what you truly want matters

In the midst of a busy life, it’s rare to take time to ask yourself what you deeply desire.

In the moment, you may want space to think, or to feel calm. You may want something yummy to eat, or feel the desire to connect to someone you miss.

Those desires are meaningful and always worth honoring.

It’s the the desires in your heart that lie deeper — those about which you have awareness and those that may be buried and need to be mined for — that many of us rarely explore.

Those deep desires are the key to creating a future that will be truly fulfilling.

You can learn to explore your deep desires

My life was on autopilot for decades. I had no idea there was another way to live. I took each day as it came, put out fires that flared, made the best decisions I could, and kept going.

It was not until I started working with a brilliant coach that I began making shifts — small at first — that opened up a world of new insight and new ways of being.

I learned to slow down, to tap my heart and listen to my intuition. I was asked great questions I hadn’t ever considered. Answering those questions lead to tremendous new awareness.

Everything I have learned, including my formal training, informs the work I now do with other accomplished women who are at a crossroads, in a transition, or are figuring out what's next.

And it’s a joy to share my approaches with great women.

Here are 3 ways to start finding your answers

1. You can begin slowly and take steady action

If you like to start with small steps, I invite you to order a copy of my book, Live Big: A Manifesto for a Creative Life. It’s full of wonderful small practices you can use each day to bring meaningful shifts into your life. (And the book is so lovely that you will want to pick it up often!)

2. Say “Yes” to a workshop experience

I developed a my Dream Big Vision-Board Workshop to help women go deep into their hearts and find their desires and truth — and capture it all visually, so they can stay committed to what they want in their lives.

I led the workshop this past weekend (see the photo below of the amazing boards that were made!) and I am exploring a date to offer the workshop again.

Sign up for my emails to get announcements, and reach out if you want to plan a special workshop for your team or group.

3. Explore what a breakthrough can look like for you

Check out my signature program Live Big Live! The spring retreat is launching soon, so this opportunity may be perfectly timed for you. (And, there are other coaching options, too.)

You can read what many remarkable women have said about their coaching experiences and outcomes, and see what resonates for you.

Self-awareness makes everything possible

All of the suggestions I included above are paths to personal insight that will set the stage for you to gain clarity and experience significant personal growth.

I would love to hear about the future you yearn to create.

And I would be delighted to provide you with new perspectives and insight, to help you gain some self-awareness right away.

Email me, or book a call here.

I look forward to our conversation!

Here are the beautiful, exciting vision boards each woman made at the workshop on Saturday. Each board shines with the clarity that was revealed in our time together!

How to play your way to a more fulfilling life

You, like most women I talk to and work with, may be focused on all you want to accomplish, and sometimes struggle to slow down and make space for yourself.

Paradoxically, you may also feel sluggish or stuck from time to time.

Some women express it as being in a funk, or feeling drained. 

They want to feel energized and upbeat, but that energy sometimes feels out of reach.

Play is a great way to ignite your spirit

When you feel low and cannot think of ways to shift into a positive, energized frame of mind, choosing to play works wonders!

And, playing sometimes sounds a bit odd to serious professionals.

I invite to you consider play with deeper insight.

Play is more beneficial than you may know

As adults, playing can sometimes feel complicated, and unimportant.

Consider that studies show that play releases endorphins (hormones in the brain and nervous system that make us feel happy). Play also helps our brains function better, reduces stress, and stimulates creativity. It even boosts physical health.

Try some (or many) of these fun ideas

Do you love collecting?

Whether you love to roam through antique markets, take walks on the beach in search of shells or driftwood, or search online for special items, set aside time, dive in, and enjoy!

Maybe games appeal to you.

Board games, competitive sports, or other types of games, excite lots of people. Rather than being a spectator, dive in! And playing these games with other people can add to the pleasure you’ll experience.

Maybe you like more solitary fun.

Choose a great jigsaw puzzle, word puzzles, or number puzzles and settle in to enjoy them.

Does exploring excite you?

You can get lost on purpose on a return trip from a meeting or errands and see what you discover. Or go to a place nearby that has intrigued you and explore in those surroundings.

You can create in so many ways!

Play with color and materials! Whether you enjoy drawing; using bright colored paints, pencils or markers; molding clay or throwing vessels on a potter’s wheel; sewing and other handwork; or building things, doing something creative and expressive is a great way to bring the spirit of play into your day!

There are endless possibilities for play. Maybe you have favorites I did not mention that you want to do more of, or are curious to try. 

Consider recruiting kids, friends, extended family, or coworkers to join the fun. The shared energy, laughter and mutual support will bring even more delight to your spirit!

What do you want more of?

Play fuels your life with positive energy, opening the way for you to connect to what really matters most for you, so you can pursue those things — even in the midst of a busy life.

It’s a game-changer to live your life with clarity about what you desire. 

And it’s a game-changer to live with a heart that is lit up.

This is how you create the life you want, day by day. It’s what I call living big!

My signature program, Live Big Live!, that was formed by my path to creating the life I desired, has helped great women like you to move past what has limited them so that they now live bigger, more confident and fulfilling lives. 

I would be happy to share the details about Live Big Live! (that will soon kick off for the spring) to see if it might take you to new heights.

Email me, or book a call here. I look forward to our conversation!

What are you doing for YOU today?

I've lived a whirlwind of exciting travel the since mid-January, and I am deeply grateful for the amazing experiences I have enjoyed.

Living in Paris, then attending a life-changing retreat in Texas, and now spending time in Arizona, I have seen heart-stopping art, been in gorgeous urban and natural environments, shared time with people precious to me, and eaten wonderful food.

For most of these weeks I sustained a “normal” work schedule, coaching clients, speaking virtually, and attending meetings on Zoom.

I have also made art with a limited set of materials that I could carry with me, and have enjoyed quite a few surprises as I created in new ways.

And now, I am (finally) slowing down to give myself the gift of rest.

We are humans, not machines

My natural inclination is to be in motion, to do.

I have an abundance of ideas. There is so much that excites me. I love my work and love connecting to new people.

And paradoxically, one of the big messages I share in my speaking appearances and writing is that we need to slow down and be still. I teach that that ability and practice is the foundation of Living Big!

“Slow Down and Be Still” is the title of the first chapter of my book, and the entire first half of the book is about the being of Living Big! Of course, there is a natural rhythm for being and doing, it’s just that I often am out of balance. And I know I am not alone.

To quote myself, we are human beings, but we spend too much time doing and not enough time being.

And even machines need down-time, and routine maintenance!

We need to return to the basics, over and over

In conversations I have had recently, a number of women have shared that their crushing schedules and pressures at work have led to burnout.

A big contributor is that many women put everyone else’s needs ahead of their own.

I am not pushing as hard as I have in the past, but I have slipped, bit by bit, into too much doing without adequately focusing on my wellbeing.

I have reminded myself that “we teach what we need to learn.” For me, it is time to get back to the fundamentals.

Small ideas for slowing things down

The key for me, and for most women, is to start making really tiny shifts. We often underestimate the impact of making small consistent changes.

You may want to pick from these ideas and see what happens.

1. Make a bedtime shift

Many women tell me they stay up late and are exhausted in the morning. Why not adjust your evening routine and go to bed 10 or 15 minutes earlier? After a few days or a week, you may try for another 15 minutes earlier.

2. A little movement works wonders

Set a reminder on your phone to go off at least once an hour. Turn away from your computer and sit and breathe for 2 minutes. (Setting the timer for two minutes will allow you just relax and breathe!) Then stand up and stretch for another minute or two. 

3. Fresh air is a game-changer

So many people spend their days inside buildings and cars. Get outside and walk at least once each day! It can be to the corner and back, a spin around the block, a walk to a lunch spot you usually drive to, following on a path in a nearby park, or walking down a city street.

4. Create more “white space”

If you look at a magazine layout, the page is sure to have margins that designers have created to make the page easy and pleasurable to ready. Nobody wants to read a page crammed with solid text! That “white space” is important in life, too. Look at your calendar and create some “white space” for yourself this week and looking ahead. What have you said “yes” to that you can you skip? What can be delegated to someone else? What can be deferred?

5. Schedule something just for you

Look at your calendar and schedule in time (anywhere from an hour to a day!) for something that will make you happy! Who might you play with? What might you explore? What will light you up? What will make you feel great? 

6. There are endless possibilities!

If nothing on this list especially sparks your spirit, or you want to do more for yourself, think about something small that will do it for you. It could be eating a fresh salad with flavors you love, or getting tickets for the theater, or making a call to someone you miss. Find something that is just for you that you can make space for now.

It is important to be mindful about these practices!

If you see the busy creeping back in, return to the awareness of how you are living — and see if you can expand on these new ways of making space for yourself and your wellbeing!

The changes I am making now

I have one more week in Arizona before returning home. I am slowing down and it feels wonderful.

I have a bit of work on my schedule this week, but I have planned to do far less than usual.

I started getting more sleep.

I now start my day listening to music I love, rather than the news.

I am walking in nature every day.

I am making time to write from the heart.

I have set things up to be able to play and make art with ease. (While my new creative experiments are not yet posted, you can take a look at my artist website here.) 

And I am firmly committed to sustaining my focus on slowing down and being intentional about my schedule when I return home next week!

If you want to share your favorite small self-care tips — or you want to share your struggles to slow down — I invite you to email me, or book a call and we can talk.

Are you ready for take-off?

If you read saw my post last week, you know that I’m taking off on an adventure today. I will be living in Paris for a whole month, and am enormously excited as I embark on this experience!

There's something magical about the moment we start a new adventure.

Whether it is traveling to explore and have new experiences in special places, or when you start anything new and meaningful, great opportunities await you.

This is a perfect time to consider the adventures you want to create in 2023.

What are you ready for now?

The fresh new year is full of vast possibilities!

What projects — related to your work and your personal life — do you feel called to make your focus this year?

What are you ready to start?

Is there a dream, or project, or initiative that you want to get off the ground?

Think about business-or work-related efforts, and also personal initiatives.

For a personal initiative, perhaps you want to start a new friendship, or create a new dynamic with family members, or plan a new garden so you can have fresh flowers and produce to enjoy as the year unfolds.

Also consider you.

Is there a new way of being you want to cultivate? Do you want to start showing up in the world in a new way?

Perhaps it’s time to start creating more space for your wellbeing — like reading, or expressing yourself through music or drawing, or pursuing a particular interest?

I’d be happy to send you a lovely guide, Creating Space for YOU to help you do that with ease, Simply email me and I'll get it right off to you. (You can forward it to friends, too, so you can start making great changes together.)

What have you begun that you want to accelerate the pace on now?

Perhaps something you started stalled out, or had to be put aside for some reason.

Is this the time to bring renewed focus and energy toward getting it moving with more velocity?

Think about things that might fall into this category that are related to your professional life and your personal life. Which one feels most meaningful or exciting to get moving?

Returning your attention — and setting clear intensions — to something that your care about that was put aside for any number of reasons will be very satisfying.

Make a plan for what your first small step can be. And put a date on your calendar when you will take that step.

What do you dream of launching now?

There may be a new project or enterprise you’ve been thinking about and you feel ready to plan to make that dream a reality.

How will you lay the foundation?

Who will you talk to for input or advice?

What research will you do?

Who might you invite into the process?

What first steps will you take to move it forward this year?

The choices you make now matter

You have the power to create the reality you truly wish for. 

How is that possible?

Start with willingness to transform and grow, to embrace the mystery and go deep, and to engage in the process of creating the life you want.

Add belief — belief that you matter. Belief that you deserve to put yourself first, knowing that when you make yourself a priority you perform at your best and are better for everyone else in your orbit. And when you embrace all of your creative power, you naturally believe in every possibility. 

Dive in to find clarity about what you truly desire, what really matters most. What will you make your focus, and why? When you mine your heart and listen to your intuition you will make clear choices.

Then make commitments. It’s necessary and worthwhile to create structure and space in your life to take action to make what you care about your reality. And commitment to cultivate creativity of every kind. This commitment to yourself and to the ongoing focus and effort required to implement change in your life will lead to remarkable growth, satisfaction, and joy.

Whatever you choose to set your sights on will will be fueled by new clarity and energy. 

If you want to talk about the year (and life) you dream of, and what may be holding you back from realizing that vision, I would be happy for us to talk.

Although I’ll be away, I am making time for 5 Live Big Breakthrough Calls this month — and there's no cost to you. I’m happy to support you in gaining perspective and new insights as you step into a year that’s full of potential for adventures of all kinds.

Email me and we’ll find a time that works in both of our time zones.