How to Build the Future You Desire, One Step at a Time

I invite you to dream a bit. Right now, right where you are.

Close your eyes for a minute or two and imagine being the best version of you in a year — or 5 years — from now.

Dare to dream big, as you imagine what that version of you will look like.

Imagine waking up each day, and how you will show up in the world.

Maybe you will be leading at a higher level. 

Maybe you will be bolder, more confident.

Maybe you will make a big change — in location, in a relationship, in the field in which you work.

Maybe you will be creating something new and amazing.

Dreams can excite you and challenge you 

Quickly jot down the vision you imagined.

Then breathe and feel the emotions that have surfaced.

I venture to guess that the vision you imagined may feel both exciting and daunting.

After all, when we dare to dream big, a part of us tends to step in and say things like:

• Who are you to dream that big?

• That idea is way too scary!

• You can’t do that! 

• You can’t be that kind of person!

• You don't know how to do that thing!
  
  

What will you choose?

It is easy to shy away from big dreams. It feels safe to stay the same.

You know the status quo, even if there are aspects of who you are now and what you do now that you wish were different.

And, its important to know that living a static life, while it may feel comfortable, takes a toll.

• When you tolerate stress…

• When you stay in a situation that is less than satisfying…

• When you fail to try things that your heart yearns to experience… 

• When you stay quiet in spite of knowing there is more of you to show the world…

you stay in a state of being that’s a smaller version of who you truly are.

I know this from personal experience. I lived a very small version of my true self for decades.

What I learned, when I dared to dream big and begin to make small changes, changed my life!

As I slowly stepped into being a more fully expressed, confident woman, I was able to slowly let go of beliefs that had relentlessly dogged me — that I was not good enough or capable enough to do big new things. That I could show up authentically and feel secure in who I was. That I would be able to discover and pursue new and meaningful work and ways of living.

I learned to believe in myself. I learned to connect to my heart and I heard what it was asking me to try and be and do.

And I dared to begin to test out new ways of showing up — and kept going.

Hold your big vision! 

Staying the same means you miss out on tremendous possibilities, great satisfaction, and knowing that you are making the most of your one precious life.

Not only that, staying the same means the world misses out on receiving all that the big, fully expressed version of you has to contribute. We miss out on your genius!

I invite you to hold your vision with reverence.

Type it out, edit it to be full and vivid.

And read it every day — when you wake up and before you go to bed. 

Then, as you start each morning, think about one tiny step you can take to move toward the vision that you conjured. 

Each day holds great opportunities for you to do something just outside of your comfort zone, like:

• showing up with more authenticity

• sharing an idea you have held back on

• proposing a small change

• reaching out and inviting someone into a conversation

• creating simply for the joy it brings you

These small, consistent kinds of actions will move you forward, in ways that will compound over time.

Why not take a tiny step in the direction of your dream now?

Share your dreams, a tiny step or two you’re taking, and how it feels. Schedule a chat here.

Overwhelmed? Here’s How a Simple ‘Mini-Reset’ Can Restore Your Energy

We humans are complex, and women who are committed to doing their best — at work, at home, and in the world — can easily overload their nervous systems.

We plan, we strive, we feel deeply, we push — often to the breaking point. Sadly, this way of living becomes “normal” for so many of us.

Even on weekends and when we take vacations, we can struggle to fully unplug and rest.

And it takes a toll.

I often say that we are not machines, but many of us live as though we were. And most of us do not even pause for routine maintenance (which we would never skip for the cars we drive!). We do not think about protecting ourselves from future breakdowns. We just keep grinding away.

What if you shifted gears?

I invite you to appreciate the vital importance of taking a break.

While it’s great to pause and breathe with intention during a busy day, I am suggesting something that will have a bigger benefit.

I call it mini-reset.

Consider setting aside a weekend day (or more time if you have a vacation planned). And to make it really interesting skip the planning.

Yup. Even if you love to plan in advance, give this a try!

Whether you are alone, with a friend, or surrounded by kids and family, imagine starting this unplanned day quietly and slowly.

Ask yourself

• what might be fun to do?

• what would bring me joy?

• how might I play?

• where might be a fun place to explore?

• what would be a great way to surprise myself?

Consider ways to spend time with no agenda other than pleasure and ease!

Maybe you’ll get in the car and take a winding country road to a town you haven't explored before, or for a while. When you get there you might try a cafe, window shop, walk through a park, meander on side streets.

Maybe you’ll head to a museum without a clue about the exhibitions on view, to follow your nose as you move through galleries and make discoveries.

Maybe you’ll choose a spot close to home and sit and watch the world go by. Look at the sky, people-watch, look closely at things you usually rush by and make a point of finding small moments of wonder.

Whatever you choose to do, notice what's around you — the sights, sounds and smells.

Take note of how you feel.

Memories may show up.

Curiosity is likely to be peaked.

New ideas may pop into your head at random moments.

Commit to periodic dates for mini-resets

Just as you would not miss your semi-annual dental appointment or annual physical, commit to regular dates for resetting your nervous system.

Remember, whether you choose a date each month or each season, you can gather up the crew or go alone. You can stay put and read something you have not made time for. You can putter in your garden if that brings you pleasure. You can cook something you've been curious to try.

These periodic mini-resets will help your complex, overworked brain and body get the preventive maintenance — including minor repairs — to function optimally.

And as you reap the benefits and continue to choose dates for resets, they will likely become a normal part of the rhythm of your life.

So pick a date for your first mini-reset right now!

And remember, as tempted as you might be, don’t do any advance planning!

Let yourself make a choice that morning and see how the day unfolds!

I’d be delighted for you to share your mini-reset experiences with me. Schedule a chat here.

Overcoming Doubt: Embrace Your Authentic Self with Confidence

Being myself — authentically and unapologetically me — and feeling completely comfortable showing up without pretense, is one of the hardest things I’ve learned to do.

It was not so many years ago that I thought I had to dress and speak the way others expected me to.

I almost always compared myself to other women I admired (and often thought I did not measure up).

I worried that I was not smart enough or capable enough, and had not secured enough degrees.

I frequently felt that I was not good enough.

All of those feelings amounted to a heavy load to bear.

I lived with doubt. I lived with a lot of shame. And I was pretty sure that almost all of the great women around me had it all together — that they were fully confident being their authentic amazing selves.

It also seemed to me that the way I thought about myself was something I would always have to live with. 

What I learned that surprised me

I started to work with my first coach about 15 years ago. I wanted help with my business at a time that the economy was brutal. In short, I wanted strategies, and nothing more.

Much to my surprise, my coach probed deeply and asked me lots of uncomfortable questions about how I showed up in the world (or didn't), and those questions brought me face-to-face with truths I was embarrassed to acknowledge.

And, I could not deny the truth — that I was operating as a smaller version of who I really was, for fear that I was not good enough.

With loving support, I was able to fully face realities I had not dared to look squarely at before. And that support from my coach enabled me to begin to show up more fully, even though it felt terrifying at first.

I eventually decided to sell my business and dove into studying the mysteries and power of creativity. After training to be a coach, I started coaching other great women who yearned to create truly fulfilling lives where they could show up as their brilliant selves, without doubting that they were not enough.

Do you feel good enough?

If you can answer that question with a whole-hearted, “Yes!” I am thrilled for you.

Your next step into creating a future that will light you up will begin with a foundation that is strong.

And if your answer is something like mine was not so long ago, or you know you had that confidence at one point and for whatever reason it has slipped away, I get it.

It can feel sad, scary, shameful or a mix of all of those emotions. It can feel daunting to imagine yourself owning your greatness without the need to fake it or struggle.

And I know that you can get there.

I did it, and I am honored to guide women though their journeys to standing proudly in their unique greatness.

Begin with taking baby steps

It feels daunting to attempt big changes all at once — and pushing yourself to make those efforts can lead to overwhelm and shut-down. Why not take a small first step instead — and why not give one a try today?

If you tend to dress in ways that feel “safe” at work, you might add a dash of color or add an accessory that expresses a facet of yourself you typically don’t show. 

If you don't have a headshot that reflects your warmth, humor, or any other aspect of your personality, consider engaging a photographer and then update your LinkedIn profile. 

If you have something to contribute and have held back for fear that your ideas are not good enough or may get shot down, think of someone you trust and test out ways to offer your suggestions with that friend or colleague. With some feedback, practice and encouragement, it will be easier for you to choose a time and place, and feel comfortable, speaking up.

Getting help makes a world of difference. Having help enabled me to move beyond my limitations — and do it with more ease and more quickly than what was possible on my own. 

It would be my pleasure to speak with you so that you can explore the ways coaching can help you to fully embrace your specialness and share it with the world.

Schedule a chat with me here.