Finding the gifts in a difficult time

A new reality is here. Most of us are at home 24/7. (And for those working in hospitals, pharmacies, food stores and other essential jobs, you, too, are adjusting to a new reality — and the rest of us are enormously grateful to you.)

Is this stressful? Certainly.

Are people having to adjust to a range of new challenges? Yes.

Is it easy? Not at all.

Even those of us who have worked at home for years, and do not have small ones (or teens) with us ’round the clock, are finding this to be a time of enormous adjustment. 

And... we always have the opportunity to create — and in this case, to create our way through the challenge. 

The gift of this crisis is that we can each create our path forward. Lots of learning, growth and possibility are available.

In the Zoom calls I offered last week and Saturday, and in three Zoom calls I attended that were offered by colleagues I admire, a lot of insight has emerged and a lot has been shared. 

These are three big takeaways:

Gift #1  We are all in this together. 

We truly need one another now. Through the remarkable technology available, we are not completely isolated. We can support one another in myriad ways. To quote my husband: Building community is one of our best tools to persevere and maintain perspective and hope.

Gift #2  We have a lot of time, and choices for how to use it. 

Some people who are at home are extra-busy now — with their work, or caring for and teaching their children, or other demands. Many of us have more time each day — because work has slowed or stopped, because we are not commuting, because usual activities are cancelled.

We all have the same 24 hours each day we have always had. And we get to choose how to use them. The circumstances we find ourselves in offer us the opportunity to get intentional about it.

For those on the busy end of the spectrum, you can make choices and set priorities. You can create blocks of time for all that needs to be done, and NOT include things that are not important now. You can create space for self-care, even if that is simply of few 5-minute breaks to sit in quiet, or time to soak in a bath at the end of the day.

For those with more hours to fill than they are used to — those who have little work, are quarantined, have fewer commitments — there are many choices to be made. How do you want to structure your day so that you are intellectually stimulated, stay physically strong, learn new things, do something creative each day, and practice self-care? Creating time blocks for your day will help you to keep from drifting, and will reduce anxiety.

Gift #3.  We can learn and we can grow. 

I have learned and started to practice some incredibly helpful new ways to make each day work. And I have refocused on things I have learned before, that are more relevant now than ever. These are all helping me to keep anxiety low, and make each day work well.

Here are a few of my go-to practices:• I sit with my journal.  I set aside 5 to 10 minutes each day and start to write. I do not lift my pen from the paper until I have poured out my emotion, and along the way I connect new dots for new insights. This has been a game-changer for me.

• I consume less news.  I do not listen to news first thing upon waking. I choose my source with care. I have an AM check-in and listen again in the evening for a few minutes. That is plenty, and it keeps me from feeling consumed with worry.

• I do something creative.  Even a small doodle, and certainly a little more time creating provides a remarkable release. (You can get into flow as you play an instrument, do something new and different while you cook, sing to the kind of music that is calling to you, or any other way of creating. Getting stimulated out in nature is also great, and you benefit from using your body, too.)

• I spend quality time with people I love.  My husband and son are at home with me, and we have taken walks together, read aloud to each other, cooked together, and are planning for other ways to make this time special. And Facetime, Zoom and phone calls with family and friends have been incredibly meaningful. 

• I am staying physically active.  Even if the weather is bad and I do not venture out for a walk, I am making time to be active indoors. This keeps my spirits up and feels really good.

• I believe and I trust.  I remind myself that we will find our way through this. I believe that we will learn valuable lessons, and that those lessons will help us in the future. I think back to times in my life when I have been resilient in the face of terrible events. And I think back to times in history — some not so long ago — when people were able to live through fear, danger and uncertainty, and survive (and often thrive) on the other side.

• I am grateful.  I end each day with thoughts of gratitude. It is my practice as I transition to sleep. (Bonus: Both expressing gratitude and getting ample sleep are key ways I am keeping my immune system strong.)

I am here and want to support you.

My second Creating Our Way Forward Zoom call on Saturday was a special time for sharing and learning. We had a wonderful group that included people dealing with an array of circumstances, from both coasts. 

I will offer another call on Sunday, March 29 at 3:00 eastern. I'm eager to share more ways to live well in these times, and eager to share the time with you.

Register here to join me.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.