How to harness your attention and reap big rewards

Have you noticed — in yourself, and others around you — how often our attention is focused on things that happened in the past and things that have not yet happened?

We replay the past for so many reasons.

We recall disappointments and mistakes and rerun them in our minds. Sometimes we replay happy events and successes, but most of us are pulled to memories that related to failures, sadness, frustration, shame and regret.

We also have a tendency to focus our thinking on things in the future.

It certainly makes sense to plan ahead and keep future goals in mind, but there's a trap here. We often create assumptions and spin stories about things that we think are likely to happen, and get stuck focused on the imagined events and outcomes.

What we miss is the opportunity to be fully present. We miss now, and all the potential of the moment we are in.

Attention is a precious commodity

We all know there are only 24 hours in a day — that limit is clear.

What most people fail to consider is that our attention each day also has limits.

Our attention is precious. We help ourselves enormously when we allocate our attention with care.

Do you ever pause to ask yourself questions like these?

• Where am I directing my attention?

• What am I choosing to focus on?

• Am I present now, or am I thinking about the past?

• Am I present now, or am I focused on what may or may not happen down the road?

I invite you to appreciate the importance of asking questions like these to assess where your attention lies in a given moment.

I also invite you to appreciate the opportunities that are yours when you are fully present.

The gifts of living in the now

We miss so much opportunity when we fail to be fully present.

Rather than suffering when we rehash events of the past (instead of learning from them and moving on), when you focus on the present you can reap the insights and opportunities that are in front of you now.

Rather than imagining (and often fretting about) things that have not happened, and may never happen, when you focus on the present you can make the most of the moment you are in, think expansively, and actively take steps to shape the future.

Being present keeps you open and aware. You can be curious. You can listen to your intuition. You can spot opportunities, and tune in to events and people around you.

Most of all, when you live in the present, you are able to create each next best decision as you move through your day.

Being fully present enables you to make the most of your precious attention, so you can create your best life one moment at a time.

Why not give yourself that gift today, and bring that awareness into your life again tomorrow? Before long, you will be living in the present with ease, and reaping great rewards.

I’d love to hear about the impact this practice has for you.

Stay safe and well, and create your life with joy.

These 3 questions may wake up your heart

Last week I had the privilege of spending four inspiring days doing deep personal work. I shared the experience with an amazing group of people, led by my remarkable coach, Michelle Villalobos.

Michelle is a business coach. I initially wanted her help to build my coaching practice, and she has certainly helped me do that. But the reason I continue to work with her is that she is on a path of doing her own deep work. She is focused on being — on who she is and how she shows up in her life — and she is a fearless explorer of this territory. She brings what she is learning into the lives of her clients.

If you have read my book, you know how aligned Michelle and I are about the importance of focusing on who we are becoming and how we show up in the world. We both believe that this is the key to being a leader in your life, which then makes it easier to build a great business — or do anything else you set out to do.

To impact the world with your gifts you need to start with the inside work.

What I dove into last week

The theme of our retreat was big: creating the new. As you can imagine, this was immensely meaningful for me. We explored how we create, what each person’s ideas are for the new they want to create, and what it will take, personally, for each of us to audaciously create in ways that will have a tremendous impact.

This was intense work, but there was also play!

I loved experiencing an afternoon of freedom, fun and laughter as I allowed myself to create with crazy materials, fueled by great music. I let go of concern about making something “good” and drew from my intuition without overthinking. It was liberating and I loved my imperfect finished piece.

And I loved watching people, some of whom had not made art since they were kids, and many who declared they did not consider themselves creative, allowing themselves to relax, play freely, and make amazing works. I witnessed joy as they shared, many claiming that they loved what they made and loved their new beliefs about themselves.

Why community is important

Magic happens when people gather this way. We learn from one another and inspire one another. The time away from “real life” gives us so much to bring back and apply to the work we do. And it supports us to each live with more awareness and intention.

3 questions you can ask yourself now

As I integrate the powerful experience I lived, I am happy to share several questions I was asked to answer. Perhaps they will be helpful and enlightening for you.

1. What can you let go of now to open the way to living your biggest, most promising life?

You might chose to let go of doubt, or perfectionism, or fear, or an old story that does not serve you — or any other limitation you want to release.

2. What power, within you, do you want to claim?

You might want to claim courage, or conviction, or passion for a cause, to name a few possibilities.

3. What new quality or project or mission do you yearn to bring into being, that will make an impact on your own life, and by extension can impact the world around you?

This question may sound daunting to ponder, but I invite you to consider that every meaningful creation you aim for — be it small or grand — can be life-changing for you, and can have ripple effects that reach beyond what you can even imagine.

Do you feel called to step into something bigger?

My work, my mission, is to unleash the untapped creative capacity inside women (and men) everywhere, so they bring all of their greatness into the world.

I am committed to using the power of love as the driving force of my work, because I know love can inspire people to embrace their full capacity to create, express and expand.

This vision inspires me every day.

And as grand as that mission sounds (and I hold a huge vision for what it will look like in the future), the growth is rooted in many small first steps.

Over and over again, what appear to be small events fuel the expansion of my mission. It’s all about having one conversation at a time.

In each connection with a woman who hears a voice inside (that may be whispering or may be shouting) that she is ready to let go of what is in her way; that she wants to find, claim and leverage her power; and that she wants to usher in something new and important to create a brighter future, a connection is made. And there is a possibility that we may be aligned.

When there is alignment, when we both believe that my support can help a woman to stop living small and step into creating her biggest life, there is true magic. Nothing is more gratifying for me than to usher in greatness and set ripple effects into motion.

And when a group of great women embark on the work with me, the power of the community accelerates the growth of each individual!

Taking a small first step can be your portal to a big future

If you feel called to take a big step up in your life, let’s make a date to talk soon. Simply email me and we’ll make that happen.

There may be alignment, or not, but one things is certain: It will be a meaningful conversation that will have an impact in your life.

And that aligns perfectly for me.

Stay safe and well, and create with joy.

How (and what) to celebrate now

Do you feel hectic energy swirling around you this holiday season? While it’s easy to get caught up in all of the activity and emotion, this is an ideal time to carve out some quiet space for yourself.

I invite you to do some resting and reflecting. And while you are at it, this is a great time to celebrate and dream.

Start with gratitude

Look back at the past year with a focus on gratitude. In spite of many challenges, there is always so much for which we can each feel grateful. Include both big and small things on your list, and jot down why you feel grateful for each one.

By the time you finish you are likely to feel filled with awe. (Studies have shown that focusing on gratitude brings enormous physical and emotional benefits. You may want to make this the start of an ongoing gratitude practice.)

Next, celebrate yourself!

Think back over the year with a focus on all the ways you have expanded and grown. Recall things you’ve accomplished and ways you have been resilient, Acknowledge yourself for all of it.

Savor the feelings of pride, joy, and satisfaction. Why not give yourself at least one “Yay me!” each and every day? (I highly recommend it!)

Visualize a wonderful future

With gratitude in your heart and feeling full of self-love after celebrating yourself, take some time to quietly look ahead at the new year. It is full of possibility.

Envision yourself a year from now, living a life that you love.

What does that look like for you? What does it feel like to imagine yourself living a life that excites you? Envision yourself living with purpose, doing work you love alongside great people, feeling joy, caring for your wellbeing, being in wonderful relationships, and living fully expressed.

How will spend your days? Who will you live and work and play with? How will you look? How will you feel?

Hold this vision, and think about it already being your reality.

The life you yearn for can be created

Day by day, you can create clarity about what you want. You can move past what limits you. You can create a future that lights you up.

I know because I have been on this path myself and my life has been transformed.

And I have been honored to guide many incredible women to step into their power and thrive as never before.

Rather than struggling and trying to figure it out on their own, they have begun creating the full, satisfying personal and professional lives they’d been yearning for. They are clear about what they want and who they need to become to create their ideal futures, and step-by-step their visions are becoming their reality.

This is a sacred process. Transformation does not happen instantly. It's in getting started, living with new awareness, and having support to sustain the effort in the course of daily ups and downs, that we can begin to wake up in our lives. We can get and stay clear about the future we want. Every small change we bring into our lives has significance and momentum grows. We revel in appreciation of the lives we are actively creating.

If you feel ready to make big strides in the year ahead, let’s talk.

Email me and share where you are now and your vision for the future, and we’ll talk about how you can get there.

As 2021 winds down, now is the perfect time to explore what is possible for you in 2022.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.